Burt's Potted History Rambles
Ted Lancaster is known as "Burt" to his ex Royal Navy pals.
I had done
a lot of stage drama work in Junior School and was the teacher's pet
in all acting productions. None of this surfaced at Secondary School.
Not until Teachers' Training College, my subsequent school teaching
career and The Citizens' Theatre did I become involved in acting,
stage-management, directing and producing, eventually finishing up at
the Birmingham Repertory Theatre in 1983 for the Citizens' Theatre
Group in a two-hander called 'Alas, Poor Fred.'
As a teenager at Scarboro Boys' High School, (Scarboro and district grammar school), I managed no more than a miserable three O.levels. I sidestepped history and geography to concentrate alone in the hall on Physics, Chemistry and Biology, the subjects where I had at least a miserable chance of success, eventually caught, interrogated and sentenced to eternal damnation by form teacher, Biff Smith. Since joining the 'Old Scabs', (http://www.oldscarborians.org.uk) I have been in touch with a handful of old boys, Roger Beaumont, Stan Halliday, Pete Hough, John Mann, David Fowler and Bill Potts (the physics master's son.)
It wasn't until I was in the Royal Navy and had to knuckle down that I discovered I had the semblance of a brain after all. It was Headteacher, Joey's idea that I join the Royal Navy as an engineer (artificer). I had always wanted to join the Mercantile as a Navigator.
I was absolutely, totally useless at the practical aspects of engineering, failing almost every practical test. I was of average ability but was horrendously slow. Partly because a degree of my factory practical time was spent practising paradiddles and drum rhythms on the steel bench top using two half-inch square files as drum-sticks. It can REALLY eat up your time. Each hour's overtime on a test job examination cost a mark and a half deduction. As I was usually ten to fifteen hours adrift, the fifty to sixty percent result I attained was knocked down to a failing mark. I was given several second chances to catch up but was eventually consigned to the Royal Naval Special Reserve, to be served in Civvy Street except in the case of a national emergency when I would be required to go and save the nation.
However, by this time I had learned that I was not quite the mental dullard I had presented at school. I became quite a high flier academically in maths, applied maths, engineering theory, sciences and English and represented the navy school at gymnastics. I was particularly fortunate in securing the extra curricular activity of ship's sound reproduction equipment operator, following in the steps of my sprog-master (the guy I fagged for, (NOT in the American sense!! just an unpaid servant),). The SRE-Op was the forerunner of what we would term disc-jockey.
After leaving the Royal Navy and while assessing the local talent, one of whom was a student teacher, I thought, " I can do that. All I need is twice as many O.s as I have now and a couple of A.s. Shouldn't take long." - and decided to make that my career.
However, realising that the teaching profession may not be absolutely clamouring to get me on board, and just on the off chance that I might never make it, I considered alternative career options. I'd discovered I had a flair for the sciences and so applied to ICI Wilton, Nylon laboratories, as an analytical laboratory assistant. While working there I topped up my qualifications at Longlands and Constantine Colleges in Middlesbrough, actually gaining a scholarship to do A-level maths and physics. Joey, our old head teacher, and Bill Potts, the physics master, would have been proud.
Pat and I met at night-school in the biology class. We married two years later and are still going strong, two boys, two girls, eight grand-kinder. (The biology lessons paid off.)
From there to the City of Birmingham College of Education and Teacher Training. I managed to scrape through on a little work effort while mainly concentrating on learning to play bass guitar, sing harmonies and form a rock music band. We started off playing rubbish at the college hops. Free entry was offered to the student who came up with a catchy name and for three years we were 'The Vacant Lot Beat Band'.
After college I taught in Birmingham schools for a short time then went fully pro with the band in pursuit of the elusive 'big time'. As the group became more adept we accepted a residency at 'The Rum Runner' nightclub in Broad Street, Birmingham, the same venue from which Duran Duran sprang about a decade or so later. Here we became The Rum Runner Katz, or just Katz. Tentative early records were made under this name, including EP, "Katz, Live at the Rum Runner." We had the same recording manager and sound engineer as Manfred Mann. We passed the audition for the Hughie Green Show but for some reason it was axed and though some air time was given on Radio One, the group were known mainly on the hospital radio circuits. Unfortunately none of our recording efforts ever made the 'big time'.
However we did have the privilege of working alongside some big name entertainers as their supporting band including Ben E King, Dusty Springfield, Tom Jones, Lulu, The Barron Knights, The Move, The Bonzo Dog Doodah Band, The Everly Bros, Chuck Berry, The Peddlers, The Tremeloes and The Tornados.
Records were made under the name of Cinnamon Quill and are still available as special collections on the Morgan Label. By the time the name was Cinnamon Quill, I had left. My records have gradually been borrowed over the years without trace except for reel to reel tapings but I do have the tracks I am currently writing and recording, produced on my own "mini recording studio" equipment.
After parting from the band I ran a pub in Smethwick, raised enough capital to start a business, children's boutique, got so badly ripped off in a scam by the vendor that I was on the verge of bankruptcy, went back into showbiz to pay off my creditors, formed the rock and roll duo, 'Mark Arran and Stevie Lee, fabulous girl drummer', (actually the wife - game girl) and got to the finals in the Mitchells and Butlers Talent Extravaganza at the Wolves Molyneux Ground Social Club where we eventually lost to a fabulous jazz combo. The rock n roll show was enhanced with a mime act, disco-decks, (rock music and ballroom), childrens' disco and puppet show. I wrote the original script for the puppet show while sitting in the car on Tescos' car park waiting for Pat. Solvent again, I went into special education and read for the degree of Bachelor of Philosophy in the Psychology of Childhood Emotional and Behavioural Disorder at Birmingham University.
The B.Phil was an educational psychology based degree without the rigors of an Ed Psych proper which I followed up by taking a further qualification in curative clinical hypnosis and psychotherapy.
Since I was a young child I'd had an interest in hypnosis after I first read up about Freud's early attempts to use it. This was followed by my mum taking me to a stage hypnotism show at an old church on Longwestgate about 1948. It may stem from my deep interest in the paranormal on which I have conducted investigative work using hypnosis to examine claims of alleged 'past lives' and hands on research with both genuine and suspect psychics and mediums.
I opened and ran the Dudley Hypnotherapy Centre from 1984 till 1998 working from time to time in Midland hospitals and even having a surgery in the Helios Health and Leisure Centre which was the site of the Health Club in the old TV series of "Crossroads."
Since my retirement from teaching in 1997, it appears that Sandwell Education were finding it difficult to cope without me and I went back into Special Ed. on a part time basis working with excluded, difficult behaviour, varmints.
We live in Stourport on Severn in the valley about a mile from the river on the edge of the Nature Reserve. It's a beautiful place and I doubt we will move again even though for a while we did hanker to be back in Yorkshire.
Ted Lancaster (Burt), retired from teaching in July 2004 and now concentrates on writing, performing, recording and publishing rock music in various styles and genres.
To hear a track click the phones.
Words and music copyright Ted Lancaster 2005. From the album "The Best of Captain Grumpy 2005".
Published by Zircon-Aardwolf Independent Network